In Defense of Santa Claus
The Possibilities in Santa Claus for Social Justice Parenting
If I had a magic wand to make the evil disappear
That means that there would be no Santa Claus no more to bring you Christmas cheer
'Cause what he represents is really greed and the need
to purchase shit from corporations that make a killin' because they feed
On the wallets of the poor who be knockin' on they door
Every Black Friday just to get some shit they can't afford
— J. Cole, She’s Mine Pt. 2
One thing we seem really clear about as progressive parents is that we don’t rock with Santa Claus! There are definitely things about the Santa Claus tradition that helps perpetuate and bolster a capitalist, patriarchal state that relies on surveillance, punishment, consumerism, and greed. But while these critiques are valid, there are benefits to social justice parenting that are provided through the belief and practice of Santa Claus. I want to show you the possibilities that Santa Claus illuminates for parents who want to raise young people who value justice, compassion, and hope and share some of the ways I am using Santa to emphasize social justice lessons for my children.
Lesson 1: We must believe in things we cannot see
I think Black kids deserve magic, mystery, and dream worlds. My children already know so much about the ugliness of the world. At nine, my daughter already knows about the history of enslavement and indigenous violence in this country, the irreversible impacts of climate change, the present realities of police brutality, why Malala was shot on the school bus, homelessness in her community, the treatment of Haitians at the border, Syrian refugees, and so much more. She is a smart girl, but she is not unique in her knowledge of these things. This is what many kids, especially children of progressives, know at her age. Thus, I am not arguing that our children should not know these things. I think their awareness of the world around them helps them know about the ways that privileges and disadvantages are connected to systems and it makes them more compassionate people. What I am arguing is that precisely because they know so much about the real world, they should have a space where they can enter into dream worlds. They deserve escape from this reality, if only for a few weeks every year. They deserve to believe in the magic that Santa Claus brings. (And to be clear, there is nothing more magical than Santa Claus. The Tooth Fairy can’t tie his shoes and the Easter Bunny could never). I have met people who cannot dream. Who are so deeply aware of the world around them that they cannot believe in anything they cannot see or feel. That is not a future or a present I want for my children. I want them to believe in things that do not fully make sense.
I love how giddy they are on Christmas Eve about what is to come the next morning. They do not know what is coming, but they believe in their hearts that whatever it is, it will be good. It is the anticipation that good things are coming, even though we are not sure what those things will be, that motivates us to do the work of freedom building. It is why we are motivated by Arundhati Roy’s assertion that, “Another world is not only possible, she is on her way.” We are giddy in anticipation about a future we cannot see. I want them to be a little too old to still believe and when they finally give it up, I hope they borrow my crystals and believe in them too. Because these are the practices we must cultivate to make the world we need. We will look to the believers and magic thinkers to help us build new futures.
Lesson 2: When things feel uncertain, we must have something steady to hold onto.
I want my children to have things that keep them steady in an unsteady world. Santa Claus is a tradition that they share with their parents, their grandparents, and their great-grandparents who were all believers. I love the intergenerational aspect of the tradition and I think it's so endearing to watch uncles, great-aunties, and distant cousins all warning them that “they better hurry up and go to sleep before Santa comes.” As a kid, I looked forward to the Santa Claus traditions we practiced in my family. The one that stands out the most was that every year when we decorated the house, my aunt would grab her makeup so we can paint our 3-foot light up Santa Black. (I see now that we may have been putting Santa in Black face, but the thing about family traditions is that they don’t have to make sense to everyone else. Lol). What I loved was the regularity of the ritual and the subtle way she ensured that we would have images of heroes that looked like us. She didn’t destroy the tradition. Instead, she made it more expansive and still held on to the magic. My husband and I have made our own traditions for our family, combining things from both of our childhoods. We spend Christmas Eve tracking Santa on the NASA website (I guess surveillance can work both ways), they bake cookies with their grandmother, and we are tickled by the shenanigans of our mischievous Elf on the Shelf. And while I don’t have to paint white Santas Black since Black Santas are readily available, I do carry on my aunt’s tradition by ensuring that my kids only visit Black Santas and that representations in the house look like us.
In social justice work, we look to history and the examples of strategic leaders and impactful organizations that made significant inroads and actualized changed to help steady us in uncertain times. Our family Santa tradition helps build the muscle for this practice.
Lesson 3: We must give unselfishly and without need for recognition or reward
I also like Santa because it is a model of the best kind of giving. That is, giving for the pure joy of making someone else happy, with no need for recognition. While others use their “gifts” to buy spaceships to travel to the Earth’s atmosphere, Santa legit flies around the world giving kids toys simply for the hell of it. That’s really cool if you think about it.
I know many people felt betrayed and angry with their parents when they learned the truth about Santa. For them, it undermined their trust in their parents and they fear of doing the same to their children. That’s a valid worry. However, it was the opposite for me. When I realized that it was my mother, a single-mother on welfare, who was the real person who gifted me some of my favorite toys, I had such profound appreciation. She did not care if she got credit. All she wanted was to see us smile and bring us happiness. She taught me how to give and today I choose to give with no expectations of reward or recognition. In our house, Santa Claus only gives one or two gifts, and we give the rest so that they can also see how excited we are to give to each other in the hopes that they will do the same. However, Santa does give the big gift, and I hope they will look back later and see this as an example of how to give with and from your heart.
Let me also briefly say this. I know this time of year critiques from social workers, educators, and others begin to circulate asking people to not celebrate Santa or to be mindful of the kinds of gifts that we say came from Santa because of the disparity between what some kids get. “Why did Santa give Johnny an iPad and only give me a toy car.” I get that. But what I want to say is,“I really hope no white person ever has cause to write about me because they’ll probably talk about my hard childhood and miss the ways that we had very happy birthdays and good Christamases” (Nikki Giovanni, Nikki Rosa). I’m quoting this poem all out of order but I like it this way for my point, which is this: I actually did grow up poor and had a dollar store Christmas where Santa gave me a cheap version of a My Sized Barbie whose leg would pop out almost every day. I named her Wanda and I loved her so much that I still remember her 30 years later. She was one of my absolute favorite toys and I was so happy Santa gave her to me. I am not saying that Christmases are not hard for poor families and I am sure that was a particularly hard Christmas for my mother. However, it was wonderful for me. What I know is families and communities often step up in big ways for the kids around Christmas. I have seen it and I have been a part of making it happen for others. I say this to say that I want to be sure that the definition of hard is not coming from people who would “probably talk about my hard childhood/ and never understand that/all the while I was quite happy.”
Lesson 4: Collectivity is the only way we get free
Finally, I love that even in the myth, Santa Claus is about collectivity. Sure, he’s the face of the movement but there is a whole team that include reindeer, elves, stand-in mall Santas, and his life partner that are all working toward a common purpose—to make kids happy. The reality of how Santa Claus happens is no different and there are many who take on the charge of being Santa Claus. As a teenager, my stepsister and I would rush upstairs ahead of our little bother to make sure that our parents didn’t forget to eat the cookies. We loved playing Santa and bringing him happiness. More importantly, we loved that we were working with so many others towards a shared goal of keeping the tradition alive. I think we have to normalize collectivity and the story of Santa Claus gives us an opportunity to do that.
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So, in my little corner of the world, I will give my kids joy, love, surprises, imagination, and magic--at least for a little while. And when it is time, I will tell them the truth—that there is a legion of Santa Clauses all over the world that want nothing more than to secretly make kids happy and help them believe in magic. I will tell them of my dreams of raising them to know that we shape the pieces of the world where we can and that our spheres of influence can hold magic. Then, I will proudly welcome them into the Santa Claus Club.
Perfect 💜